LinkedIn Pinterest Share on Twitter Boosting intimacy may be more important for maintaining long-lasting romantic relationships than reducing insecurities, according to new research published in Social Psychological and Personality Science.“When we think about the question ‘why do couples break up?’ what we easily and mostly think of are some ‘negative’ events and feelings such as cheating, lying, fights and insecurities,” explained study author Yoo Bin Park, a PhD student at the University of Toronto and member of the MacDonald Social Psychology Research Lab.“However, our team has been generally interested in the important role the ‘positives,’ and in particular feelings of intimacy, play in relationship maintenance. So we decided to address that question in a prospective study with participants currently involved in a relationship.” Share on Facebook Share Email The researchers recruited 4,105 adults and had them complete weekly surveys regarding their relationship until they broke up. Of the initial sample, 111 participants completed a 27-day daily diary study following their breakup and 76 of these participants also completed a follow-up survey one month after the conclusion of the daily diary study.After controlling for gender, age, and relationship length, Park and her colleagues found that perceived intimacy predicted whether or not participants continued to stay with their partner.Specifically, participants who disagreed with statements such as “It’s interesting to learn more about my partner”, “Being with my partner gives me opportunities for personal growth”, and “I enjoy sharing things about myself with my partner” tended to have shorter relationships. This was true even when the researchers accounted for other factors such as relationship satisfaction and attachment insecurities.Surprisingly, the researchers found that concerns about negative evaluations (“I worry about what my partner thinks about me”) did not appear to significantly predict breakups.“Especially for anyone who is thinking ‘something’s missing in my relationship,’ I think they should take away from this study that it might be the intimate connections that they are missing and they should do something about it rather than overlooking its importance just because it doesn’t come across as serious a red flag as frequent quarrels would, for example,” Park told PsyPost.“Oftentimes, couples drift apart not necessarily because they hate each other but because they get used to and take for granted the reward they get from connecting with their partner. Intimate connection is more than a relationship luxury and may in fact be crucial to relationship longevity, so investing some time and efforts to experiencing that will be worth it.”The researchers also found that perceived intimacy was unrelated to postbreakup attachment to an ex-partner, which could be because of how memories function.“Just as specific details of an event or information are lost over time and only a global meaning or summary is retained, memories from the previous relationship that are left to affect postbreakup outcomes may be a global sense of how satisfying or positive the relationship experience was rather than specific aspects of the relationship,” the researchers said.As with any study, the new research includes some caveats.“We didn’t look at the partner’s part of the story in this research. It’s possible that the relationship one partner considers as sufficiently intimate is not at all fulfilling the other partner’s needs for intimacy,” Park said.“So I think it’ll be important and interesting to look at how both partners’ level of intimacy contribute to the breakup decisions — is one partner’s lack of intimacy enough to fail a relationship or would the relationship survive if there’s at least one partner perceiving enough intimacy in their relationship?”The study, “Lack of Intimacy Prospectively Predicts Breakup“, was authored by Yoobin Park, Emily A. Impett, Stephanie S. Spielmann, Samantha Joel, and Geoff MacDonald.
I was sad to see the numerous closed and “for sale” businesses and motels along Routes 30, 28 and 8.The pandemic has really done a number on the economy up there.Along the way, I observed many political signs for Trump, Stefanik and Tedisco. I saw no signs for Biden-Harris or Cobb.Coming home through Wells, I came up behind two vehicles from New Jersey. As we passed a Trump sign, two right arms with extended middle fingers appeared from the second vehicle.Two thoughts came to mind.First, those people, by that time, must’ve had very tired middle fingers. Second, there was another shining example from the self-proclaimed political party of civility and tolerance.Timothy J. O’NeillScotia Hinchey will provide strong leadershipIf we’ve learned anything during this pandemic, it’s that we need strong leadership in the capital and right here at home.We need someone who is actively on the ground and putting the people of our community first. Throughout the pandemic,Michelle Hinchey has been in every county volunteering to support people during this crisis, from small businesses to farmers. When she entered the race to be the next senator for the 46th New York State Senate District, Ms. Hinchey didn’t know it would be during a pandemic. However, she has risen to the occasion and has met the needs of the community.Recently, I was impressed by her virtual town hall on supporting first responders on the frontlines during the COVID-19 outbreak, and her commitment to continue working with them far beyond the pandemic.Ms. Hinchey has been proactive in her response and assistance to our community, reassuring us of her commitment to be on the ground hearing from people like you and me, while also fighting for us in Albany.Rachel RappazzoSchenectadyMore from The Daily Gazette:EDITORIAL: No more extensions on vehicle inspectionsEDITORIAL: Don’t repeal bail reform law; Fix it the right wayEDITORIAL: Thruway tax unfair to working motoristsHIGH NOTES: PPEs, fighting hunger, backpacks and supplies for kidsEDITORIAL: Take a role in police reforms Most store bought thermometers are more accurate than + or – 5 degrees. Some of the broadcast meteorologists are not even using the airport reading, but the Pine Bush thermometer instead.My Davis thermometer, which had always been close to the airport readings (within a degree for a monthly mean), gave me an August average (of both high and low temperatures) 3.6 degrees warmer than the airport (72.4 F versus 68.8).By not replacing this thermometer and its cool readings, the NWS will taint not only our climate data but the measure of how much our planet is truly warming. They need to replace the thermometer and review the temperature records since July 17.Hugh JohnsonAlbanySome things are just too odd for wordsJust before Jimmy Kimmel was outed for his blackface appearances, he announced that he would be taking the summer off. After months of lockdown and doing his show from home, he explained that he wanted to spend more time with his family. I thought that was the world’s greatest knee slapper.Then I heard Andrew Cuomo was going to write a book on covid response. You just can’t make this stuff up.Michael ReillyNiskayuna Santabarbara spans the political divideIt’s great to see someone like Assemblyman Angelo Santabarbara working with Democrats and Republicans to actually get things done at the state capitol.After the terrible crash in Schoharie, he was able to pass new laws needed to keep people safe in limousines. He also fought to get new legislation passed to make school buses safer.It’s also been so important to have such a strong advocate for special needs students during these times. Angelo has been able to get new bills passed to help people with disabilities. Too often, their needs are overlooked or just left out. Angelo is one of the few that can consistently get bills passed and signed into law with support from both political parties.Geraldine SzawielaSchenectadyJoy will fight to keep our freedoms intactThis past Monday was Labor Day. The last line of our national anthem, “land of the free and the home of the brave” comes to mind.To promote healing of our divided nation, President Lincoln freed all those held captive by slavery, free of body and free to enjoy constitutional freedoms denied them.The covid pandemic, subsequent health care crisis and state governors having temporary executive order powers denied citizens their constitutional rights. When will they be restored? Categories: Letters to the Editor, OpinionWhy no outrage over the actual shootingsThe Gazette’s recent editorial page cartoon of the white policeman shooting a Black man in the back has caused quite the kerfuffle. There have been letters to the editor filled with vitriol, protests in front of the Gazette building, and even a resolution from a local town council demanding an apology.The cartoon was meant of course to evoke images of the shooting of Jacob Blake, as well as other cases of seemingly indefensible police violence against people of color. No thinking person should or would take the cartoon as an indictment of all police because such a blanket indictment would be patently absurd. The police are overwhelmingly defenders of justice, not perpetrators of injustice. And yet, that absurd interpretation of the cartoon seems to have taken hold.I haven’t counted the number of letters to the editor decrying this cartoon versus the number of letters protesting unnecessary police violence against George Floyd, Jacob Blake, Breonna Taylor and the many others too numerous to mention, but the reaction to the cartoon seems far greater and more vehement than reaction to the actual shootings. To quote the alien Mr. Spock from Star Trek when he observed human behavior that he couldn’t square with logic, I find this phenomenon “Fascinating.”Jerry JasinskiNiskayunaDisappointed by tall grass along bike pathA friend and I went biking on the Schenectady bike path from the college to Rotterdam during the beautiful Labor Day weekend. Our daily news media, no, not all of them, have captured pictures of protesters, a.k.a rioters, disrupting dinner parties at restaurants and demanding that the stressed-out patrons raise a fist-like salute in support of whatever the fancy of the day is. You know, all those raised-fist salutes remind me of what a certain German fascist leader required of his followers. Some things never change, do they.Allen R. RemaleySaratoga SpringsStefanik is no backer of law and orderI admit I am confused by Rep. Elise Stefanik’s claim that she supports law and order. I spent over 40 years carrying a badge. Her performance during the House hearings on Donald Trump’s impeachment was disgusting.She was unswayed by the facts or the law, and instead acted rather like a shady defense attorney. She personally attacked those who were trying to bring the truth to light. She blindly supported someone who belongs in jail. A man who steals from his tenants, cheats on his taxes, crucifies immigrants (but ignores the law to hire them at his businesses) blackmails other world leaders, tampers with witnesses, promises pardons to those who will break the law for him, is changing a proud national police agency to a political arm of his campaign by appointing a sleaze-ball to run it, orders police to attack non-violent protesters and media people, fires witnesses who tell the truth, threatens staff not to respond to requests of Congress to testify and even refuses to respond to legal subpoenas.The obvious solution to this is to replace the president and enablers like Stefanik. Voting for Joe Biden and Tedra Cobb this November is a start.Chris MorrellMaltaThe writer is a retired chief from the Saratoga County Sheriff’s office.Remove our unfit commander-in-chief“Losers and suckers.” This is the description by our “commander-in-chief” of our servicemen and women, our heroic military forces, who risk their lives every day to keep us safe. Merriam-Webster defines bravery as “showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear and difficulty.” I add someone who puts the needs of others before self. Liz Joy, running for the the District 20 congressional seat, embodies these qualities.At great risk and personal harm, she fought off my daughter’s knife-wielding attacker. Reading my daughter’s medical record, medical professionals told her, “You shouldn’t be alive.”Once again, we are a nation divided. We need Liz’s character and commitment representing District 20. She will fight for our freedoms and foster bipartisan healing. Our nation’s future depends on you. Vote on Nov. 3.Once again, we are a nation divided. Liz Joy will fight to keep our freedoms intact and foster healing. Vote on Nov. 3.Fran UnderhillScotiaOld symbols get new life in today’s worldPlus ca change, plus c’est la meme chose! Roughly translated, it means that the more things change, the more they stay the same.Certain gestures or signs do call up the recognition of things past. Oh, sure, there are universals, those recognizable little configurations which have international meaning — the one-finger salute, the ‘V’ for victory or whatever. But lately, something else has caught my attention. We were totally disappointed in the fact that it has not been mowed in a long time. What happened? It was totally overgrown with weeds.We have been to a few other trails in other towns and they are mowed nicely.Come on Schenectady, you can do better than that.Judy ConnellyScotiaAirport must replace faulty thermometerOn July 17, the National Weather Service (NWS) replaced the thermometer sensor at the Albany International Airport, where the official temperatures are kept for the Greater Capital Region.It turned out that the sensor was likely reading around 3 degrees too low. According to the NWS standards, the acceptable tolerance for a thermometer is around + or – 5 degrees Fahrenheit (F).Meanwhile, many scientists argue that just a 3 degrees change in the overall earth temperature could begin to trigger extinction of many species, including mankind. Right now, the earth has warmed around 2 F in the past 50 or so years. Trump simply cannot fathom why anyone would serve this country for such low wages, subjecting themselves to injury and death.Clearly, he is no “loser.” Five deferments for fake bone spurs saved him from serving our country. Mr. “Make America Great Again” is no patriot. He is a phony, a despicable coward and a narcissist.It is no wonder he didn’t respond when Putin placed bounties on the heads of our servicemen and women. He sees them as losers; their lives don’t really matter. I cannot imagine how parents of soldiers and veterans feel about this disgusting, fraudulent “commander-in-chief.”In 2015. Trump called John McCain, a national war hero, a “loser” because he was captured — one more ugly wart on the grotesque soul of Donald Trump.We have a traitor, a serious threat to our national security, an enemy of America, in control of our safety and the lives of our heroic servicemen and women. It may be time for our citizens to “storm the Bastille” and forcefully remove this monster before he destroys America. I’ll make the trip.Vince DacquistoNiskayunaDemocrats show true colors on civilityI recently took a 190-mile motorcycle ride through the southern Adirondacks. The day was perfect, with moderate temperatures, partly cloudy skies, and few bugs. Everyone I encountered was friendly and courteous. Carmela JadaBurnt HillsWhat’s really best for unwanted children?Back in the early 1800s, there was no birth control and most people were farmers. If an unwanted child was born, it would be spoken for by a neighboring farm family, who would raise it as their own.After the Civil War, the country became more industrialized. Unwanted children were addressed to orphanages, where they learned to read, write, solve mathematical problems and a trade (e.g. Charlton, Saratoga, my ancestors taught there).Sometime after 1900, these orphanages were abandoned. (Charlton, Saratoga County, became a penal colony for wayward girls with no training facilitated.) Now the facts show (multiple independent charities solicit funds) that there are over 1 million homeless, hungry children in the United States.There is no attempt to care for these children: there are no families waiting to adopt our U.S. children. Social programs that cared for these children are continuously under attack by the conservative evangelical right and being cut by politicians who only claim to be Christian.Therefore, my question to you folks is, “Is it more humane to abort an unwanted child or is it better to force the child to be born and then let it starve or freeze to death on the streets?”Lou CookBallston Spa Stefanik is doing a lot to help districtRep. Elise Stefanik announced the 39th result in the campaigns 100 Days, 100 Results Programs.This highlights the critical wins that she has delivered to the North Country. She released her funding for Fort Ticonderoga and said she has worked with the National Endowment of the Humanities to secure over $250,000 in funding it.This money will go towards the expansion and enhancement of their virtual programing to boost education and appreciation for the North Country’s rich history and culture.Fort Ticonderoga holds North America’s largest 18th century artillery collection, 2,000 acres of historic land on Lake Champlain, the Carillon Battlefield, and the largest series of untouched Revolutionary War era earthworks surviving in America. It brings in over $12 million into the greater Ticonderoga area each year.This grant funding is very important for the investment in education, preservation of our nation’s history, and our local communities.This 100 days, 100 Results program is very important to win over a lot of the people who are unsure of the accomplishments that Rep. Stefanik strongly fights to get done.All of these results are very beneficial to the 21st District and she continues to accomplish more for her people.
Read Rachel Rothwell’s blog on fixed fees Master of the rolls Lord Neuberger has warned that alternative business structures may sound the ‘death knell’ for hourly billing. Speaking at the Association of Costs Lawyers conference today, Neuberger said clients were increasingly put off by hourly billing and attracted by fixed fees. As well as ABSs, he said the economic climate and the advance of legal comparison websites make fixed – and mostly lower – fees inevitable. But Neuberger told lawyers they should not fear for their business or expect worse pay as a result of changes to the market. ‘If litigation is cheaper, elementary economics suggests that there will be more of it,’ he said. ‘Rather than charging high in a few cases, and driving away those with valid claims from the courts, lawyers should be able to charge realistic fees, and encourage many more clients to instruct them to fight their case. So, significantly lower legal costs should not lead to less money for lawyers, but it should lead to better value for money, and should give to our citizens what so many are currently denied, namely access to justice.’ Neuberger claimed that excess legal costs had ‘disfigured’ the civil justice system for too long and praised Lord Justice Jackson for the ‘boldest attempt to cure our costs problem yet attempted’. If the Jackson proposals fail to reduce costs, he said, the UK would have to adopt either a US-style costs rule or German-style fixed-costs regime. Neuberger also revealed that all judges will be sent for a day’s training to accustom themselves to the new era of costs post-Jackson. ‘I appreciate you will not get judges to have a brilliant understanding of costs management from one day’s training,’ he said. ‘Judges will make mistakes and not get the point but the only way they will learn is by doing that.’
SUBSCRIBE TO US COMMENT WATCH US LIVE Written By First Published: 4th June, 2020 06:27 IST Associated Press Television News Here’s what NASCAR hopes is the honky tonk truth — that a Nashville reboot is good enough this time to make the sport a tough ticket in the heart of one of the entertainment hot spots of the south.The first step? Convincing its star drivers the trip to Nashville Superspeedway in 2021 is the spark of a motorsports rebirth in the area and not just another lazy ride on an intermediate concrete track.And, that the Superspeedway will prove a worthy choice over the historic half-mile Fairgrounds.There’s little sense now debating which track is worthy of the renovations and safety upgrades necessary to hold Cup Series races at least through 2024. Dover Motorsports, Inc. held on to the track it developed nearly 20 years ago —The Nashville area appears ready to go racing. The stock series staged a wildly successful blowout last December for its season-ending awards celebration. Drivers performed burnouts on Broadway, NASCAR fan and country music star Blake Shelton was the star of a party and — step aside, Randy Travis — there was a NASCAR-themed night at the Grand Ole Opry.“We need to make sure that we match the expectations of the industry and the Nashville community with what we do with the facility and how we operate,” Dover track president Mike Tatoian told The Associated Press.Dover wants to act smart in the expansion. The company said it would pump $8 million to $10 million into the track for capital improvements and does not plan to add permanent seating beyond the 25,000 capacity currently at track.“We only have one person out there,” Tatoian said. “We’ve had a maintenance person just to help. So we’ve never been able to take advantage of the phone calls that we still get today from people that want to rent the facility for various things. Now, we’re able to do that again.”The 1.33-mile concrete track was built in 2001 by Dover Motorsports and hosted NASCAR and IndyCar events until 2011. Nashville Superspeedway held Xfinity and Truck events, as well as IndyCar races, from 2001 until 2011. Tatoian said he’s open to all three series returning to the schedule. But the track has never held an elite Cup Series race.“We were successful,” Tatoian said, “we just weren’t successful enough to sustain ourselves. There’s a big difference between Cup and those other two races.”“While they continue to work on the Fairgrounds and areKennedy added: “We’ll certainly stay in touch with them as things move along and continue to support them there.”Dover expected the Superspeedway to become a NASCAR fixture and not just a placeholder until the Fairgrounds becomes a viable option. NASCAR eyed a race date of June 20, 2021, and — as the tentative first race in NBC’s portion of TV schedule — it would be a blast to debut under the lights. The track sits about 35 miles southeast of Nashville, closer to Gladeville, Tennessee.“I think the uniqueness of it tied to the market is kind of a win-win scenario,” Kennedy said. “I think it will certainly add a little bit of variety to the schedule, kind of another turning point as we think about the next iterations of the 2021 schedule.”Dover has been a NASCAR home sine 1969 and the site of two race weekends each year since 1971. The concrete mile track, where seven-time champion Jimmie Johnson has 11 career victories, was scheduled to hold a race in May this season until the coronavirus pandemic forced a postponement. Dover is expected to run Cup races on Aug. 22 and 23.“Our company will get stronger, which means our situation in Dover will get even better,” Tatoian said. “Unfortunately, there are going to be some disappointed fans and we understand that. But if you’re a true NASCAR fan, you really will embrace this, even though it may mean going to Dover one less time.” LIVE TV Last Updated: 4th June, 2020 06:27 IST NASCAR Ready For Long-term Commitment In Nashville Here’s what NASCAR hopes is the honky tonk truth — that a Nashville reboot is good enough this time to make the sport a tough ticket in the heart of one of the entertainment hot spots of the south FOLLOW US
Nat Coombs and Paolo Bandini are joined by experts from around Europe to look ahead to the weekend’s football matches including the Madrid derby and Der Klassiker between Bayern Munich and Borussia Dortmund in Germany